Bathurst woman shares what it's like to be a foster carer

Mary (whose name has been changed by the Western Advocate to protect the privacy of the children in her care) has been a foster carer in Bathurst for more than a decade.

Contrary to what people might think the profile of a foster carer looks like, she is a young, single woman with no children of her own.

Over the last decade she has provided care to around 15 to 20 children - some of it long-term care, others in only a respite or emergency care capacity.

She is currently providing long-term care to four children, who have been with her since they first entered the foster care system, and has another two staying with her temporarily.

At times it can be challenging, but she said seeing the joy on these children's faces and watching them grow keeps her going.

In addition to providing parent-like care, she also ensures that children maintain a connection with their birth families where possible.

She said she has a strong bond with her long-term children and a positive relationship with their families.

"You kind of develop that over time, and they sort of become part of your family and vice versa as long as it's safe. I'm fortunate that it's safe and we have a good relationship," she said.

"You have to set boundaries, but generally it's a good relationship and something the kids really love seeing, that we can all be a family in their eyes.

"One of the most rewarding things for me is being able to incorporate the whole kid's life, their birth family side and our family."

As this local woman proves, people don't have to fit any particular mould to be a foster carer, so long as they are prepared to provide the love and support a child from a difficult background needs.

"You can be single, you could be a same-sex couple, you could be a married couple with kids, without kids. I don't have any children of my own. I was a paramedic before this, I went into this as a single, non-child person, and have just gone from there because of my love of children and just grown and developed as a carer," she said.

"It doesn't matter what background you've got, if you've got a a heart to look after kids, then it is doable for everybody."

Foster carers receive both financial and emotional support, as well as training to help them respond to various situations.

They also have the flexibility to choose whether they want to provide short-term or long-term care, depending on what suits their lifestyle.

Mary said that she foresees herself being a foster carer for at least another 10 years, by which time the youngest child in her care will be an adult.

She is yet to have a child that has aged out of the foster care system, but she said when that happens they will still have a roof over their head and a place in her family if that's what they want.

There is currently a foster carer shortage in Bathurst and people are encouraged to get in contact if they think they might be able to help.

For more information, visit the Communities & Justice NSW website or the My Forever Family NSW website.

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